They're Watching directed by Micah Wright and Jay Lender
This is another found footage film. Obviously there is an immediate credibility issue with found footage films because (a) who is going to be taking pictures and video while they're running for their life and (b) who has time or interest to capture everything they're doing on a day even when they're not trying to stay alive. They're Watching rather adroitly steps around those issues by saving most of the mayhem for the ending and by offering a reasonable explanation for why all events before then are captured on video. You see the protagonists of this tale are a production team for a real estate show, imagine House Hunters International, who have traveled to the far reaches of Moldova to chronicle the adventures of an American woman, Becky (Brigid Brannagh), a pottery artist who has fallen in love both with a Moldovan soccer star, Goran (Cristian Balint) and a run down home in the forest that she intends to renovate. So obviously the production team and the Home Hunters Global star will always be recording. The team doesn't necessarily like each other all that much. The host and star of the show Kate Banks (Carrie Genzel) is a nerve grating phony when she's on camera and an annoying bully when she's not. Her cameramen and production/sound assistants Greg (David Alpay) and Alex (Kris Lemche) have learned to tune out the worst of Kate's rants, usually by ingesting copious amounts of alcohol and chocolate but also by seeking companionship with local women. Well that last part is mostly Alex, who is unafraid of being rejected or making a fool of himself. Greg's a bit more sensitive. He's haunted by his time in Afghanistan. The group is led around Moldova by the local louche real estate agent Vladimir (Dimitri Diatchenko) who translates for them. The team returns to Moldova six months later to document for the show what Becky and Goran have done with their home.
Well they want to see what Becky has done with the home. She's the member of that duo who is most interested in home improvement. And Becky is the one who was most excited by the home. This time on the return to Moldova the team also includes the production assistant Sarah (Mia Faith) an eager new film school graduate who is also the niece of a network big shot. Sarah was hired over Kate's strenuous objections. Kate doesn't like Sarah one bit. It's mostly unstated but Kate resents what she sees as nepotism. Kate also views the younger and more attractive Sarah as simultaneously too weak to succeed and a possible threat to her position. Have you ever made a mistake at work and had a supervisor or someone senior to you immediately brutally correct you in such a way that you know they have long been anticipating and salivating over the chance to take you down? That's how Kate responds to Sarah's mistakes. And as a newbie Sarah makes her share of errors. During their down time the team tries to enjoy the local sights but there's not much to see or do other than drink and make goo-goo eyes at each other or some sullen locals. A few "ugly American" incidents occur. There's some local history which is backstory but still very significant to the city residents. You ignore it or make fun of it at your peril. You can guess what the American protagonists do. For most of the movie the Americans' worst problems are hard stares and uncomfortable silences. And the danger isn't necessarily coming from where you think. The ending is insane but in a good way. If you like thriller or horror movies this one is just entertaining enough to recommend. It's competent but not much more. It plays on the familiar fear of the unknown which most of us have dealt with at some point. This could be something you run into by traveling to a foreign country or by doing something as prosaic as making a wrong turn and winding up in a dangerous neighborhood at night. Obviously if you don't like these sorts of films then this movie isn't for you. There are a fair number of comedy moments. There are only a few "gotcha" moments. Mostly there is just unease which is slowly turned up to dread. The camera work does make you believe that you are there. TRAILER
Black Dynamite directed by Scott Sanders
The older movie Black Dynamite is a loving homage to and parody of a number of movies which were made from say 1967 to about 1975 and have become linked together under the category of "blaxploitation". These movies didn't necessarily have super high budgets. They weren't necessarily financed by, directed by or produced by Black people. The quality of writing and acting could vary dramatically. Some of the directing and camera work was sublime; other directing on display could make you think that you were watching work done by someone who had flunked film school multiple times. Like any other type of film genre, obviously quality varied. What these movies did tend to have in common was black protagonists, who to paraphrase football player and genre star Fred "The Hammer" Williamson, "survived until the end of the movie, won most or all of their fights, and got the girl". This was almost revolutionary for audiences who were still used to seeing black actors and actresses onscreen in subordinate or stereotypical roles or not at all. Of course some of these movies were pure pandering and cheap catharsis in which noble black heroes stood up to evil white racists and as often as not beat the everloving daylights out of them, after being suitably provoked of course. Other movies in this genre had some very negative messages packed within. These films could be formulaic, stereotypical and trite just like any other movies could. But as we've discussed before people like seeing themselves on screen. If you are dying of thirst you're not going to tell someone offering you some spring water that no thanks you only drink distilled. Black Dynamite pulls off the trick of being simultaneously serious and as silly as can be. The lead actor playing the titular hero, Michael Jai White, also wrote the film. White is also an accomplished martial artist. So the action and there's a lot of it in this movie is definitely in White's wheelhouse. The entire film is a tongue in cheek reference to too many blaxploitation films to mention but the plot will be immediately familiar to anyone who's ever sat through an action film. Black Dynamite is a semi-retired bada$$ veteran secret agent community leader player who tells everyone that he's out of the game. Of course you know that when someone says he's done and only wants to look out for himself that sooner rather than later he's coming back. Black Dynamite's wake up moment comes when his brother Jimmy (Baron Vaughn) is murdered.
Black Dynamite comes back with a vengeance to find out who was responsible and deliver some righteous justice. He finds out that his brother's murder may be connected to a drug ring that is pushing dope into black orphanages. And that's just the outer ring of the conspiracy. But no matter how high the corruption goes or what evil plans are exposed, Black Dynamite will not let anyone prevent him from completing his roaring rampage of revenge. Black Dynamite is assisted by Gloria (Salli Richardson). Nicole Ari Parker is the undercover Panther Mahogany Black. Other actors featured include Nicole Sullivan, Tommy Davidson (both MadTV veterans), Arsenio Hall, Obba Babbatunde, Mykelti Williamson, Mike Starr, Miguel Nunez, and Richard Edson. This film is full of gags like visible boom mikes, continuity errors (actors who were clearly killed in a previous scene show up just fine in later scenes), people who repeat their lines, bad dubbing, misspelled credits, and of course revolvers that never need to be reloaded. And that's just the obvious stuff. Although the humor is not as relentless and as over the top as say Airplane, it's still pretty out there. This movie was shot on old Kodak film. It lifts footage from seventies movies and television shows. I think you will enjoy this movie immensely if you are familiar with the films it spoofs but even if you've never seen the source material I think you may find this humorous. White holds everything together by taking everything seriously, even in the most ridiculous situations. But you shouldn't take anything seriously in this movie. TRAILER
Let's say that you invite a guest to your home. He says he needs to relieve himself. You inform him where the restroom is. But he says "No thanks, I keep it 100!" He then proceeds to remove his lower clothing and joyously defecate on your living room carpet. When you inform him that you have a BIG problem with what he just did he self-righteously accuses you of hypocrisy. After all, everyone has body functions. Why should he hide his? How dare you impose your hypocritical standards on him. He's a better person than you because he's honest. That admittedly imperfect analogy describes my feelings when I read that comedian and writer Larry Wilmore had used a form of a racial slur at the Saturday White House Correspondents Dinner to describe President Obama and his appreciation for the President. Wilmore, the host of Comedy Central's "The Nightly Report," used the term at the close of his comedy monologue at the annual glittery gathering of politicians, journalists, celebrities and dignitaries. He ended his 20 minutes of barbs with sincere personal remarks about what it means to see a black president in his lifetime. “When I was a kid I lived in a country where people couldn’t accept a black quarterback,” Wilmore said. “Now think about that: A black man was thought by his mere color not good enough to lead a football team. And now to live in your time, Mr. President, when a black man can lead the entire free world. Words alone do me no justice. So, Mr. President, I'm going to keep it a hundred. Yo Barry, you did it, my n---a." Wimore pounded his chest in a "peace out" gesture. Obama returned the gesture, laughed and rose from his seat to shake Wilmore's hand.
What sort of Jedi mind trick have racists done on black people so that not only do we call each other a racial slur that they created but we are proud to do so and consider it daring and revolutionary to do so in front of white people? In fact a big part of the reason that some of us want to use that word is just so we can go na-na-na-na at white people and say you can't say it so there!
No other group routinely does this.
No Jewish person would go to a ceremony and congratulate Ruth Bader Ginsburg by calling her a k**e.
No Italian would speak in mixed company about how proud they are of Rudy Giuliani, their d**o from way back.
No South Asian would give a shout out to their street s***** comrade, US Attorney Preet Bharara. No East Asian would tell US Ambassador Gary Locke that they are proud that he's a g**k just like him. Why? Because those communities all seem to have enough self-respect and common sense to realize that a) you don't insult your own in public that way and b) some words can't be reclaimed.
Somehow the Enemy has convinced us that by using his language to describe each other we're doing the right thing and keeping it real. Real stupid. Again. My rant is not about that hoary foolish dance that blacks and whites engage in where whites self-righteously claim to be mightily offended and oppressed that they can't say n******. Besides although I am by definition not privy to exclusively white conversations, some friends of mine who are tell me that some whites have no problem letting racial slurs fly once they feel comfortable and safe. That's not what it's about. My question is why are black people still saying it? Because I tell you the fact that we still routinely refer to each other with racial slurs is probably not unrelated to the fact that we have such a high murder rate. It's probably not unrelated to the fact that people just off the boat who can barely speak English often dominate such businesses in the black community such as hair care or gas stations or grocery stores. It's probably not unrelated to the fact that every day there is news about how this or that white billionaire/millionaire is making a deal in downtown inner city USA or is being asked to save some inner city while somehow after 45+ years of black civic leadership the black businesses in inner cities are disproportionately wig shops, church affiliated businesses or cell phone franchises. It's probably not unrelated to the fact that even the black professional class has a tough time finding black clients because several black people prefer white money managers, agents, lawyers, doctors, accountants, real estate agents,etc. So the black community can't offer regular employment to either its professional class or its knucklehead class, with dire albeit different consequences for both. Is this all because of self-hate and using racial slurs with each other? Well no. Obviously not. But self-hate plays a part. You can not trust, love or work well with someone when you use dehumanizing language to describe them. Dehumanizing someone makes it easier to hate them or kill them.
What message does it send the world to have a black man referring to the most powerful black man in the word as a racial slur? Netanyahu and Putin probably loved that scene.
How did flaunting our supposed ability to call each other racial slurs in public become principled defiance to racist white power? I missed that memo. No one's perfect. White supremacy has done a number on us all. But we should fight against that mindset, not celebrate it. When I hear people go out of their way to call each other n******s and b****s when brother and sister should be used, I hear someone who deep down inside is still terrorized and mentally defeated. Such people are so scared of being free and independent that they'd rather hold on to the language of submission and enslavement. There are times, when contrary to the modern zeitgeist, the street people, the common man, the poor man, etc gets it wrong. Wilmore and Obama both know better. They should set a better example, not pander to low class stereotypes. Wilmore was tactless and tasteless. And worst of all, he just wasn't funny.
Hey there. Remember Bran Stark? Well he's back. And he's apparently somewhere around 24. Ok well not really but his aging is quite noticeable. The show creators said that after this season they only think that they need maybe another 13 episodes to complete the story. They had better hurry because Bran and to a lesser extent Arya are really growing up quickly. I have a friend who is a bit perturbed that Bran's big plan seems to be to become a tree. Well there's more to it than that I hope but that is where we open up this episode. Bran and his creepy sensei the Three Eyed Raven (Max Von Sydow) are in the weirwood tree roots. They are exploring the past together. Bran and the Three Eyed Raven watch a young Ned and Benjen Stark in the courtyard of Winterfell spar as their older brother Brandon offers pointers. Their sister Lyanna rides in to show off her equestrian skills before trying to get a young Hodor to practice with her brothers. It seems that Hodor was always large and good natured but he wasn't always simple. His name is Willas. He can speak as well as anyone. Old Nan puts the kibosh to Lyanna's idea, saying that Willas is just a stablehand and needs to focus on that. Bran wants to stay in the past longer and find out what happened to Willas/Hodor but the Three Eyed Raven pulls him back to the present. The Three Eyed Raven says there is danger in remaining for too long in the past. Meera is sitting outside, no doubt upset about her brother's death. Bran asks after her but Meera doesn't want to be bothered with Bran at the moment, even as a feral looking Child of the Forest girl tells her that Bran needs her. At Castle Black it's showdown time. Thorne tells the diehard Snow loyalists that either they come out or he's coming in. Davos and crew draw their swords. Ghost bares his very long and very sharp teeth. Thorne has his people start to break down the door. It's a very tense scene. But just as Thorne and company are about to kick through the damaged door, Dolorous Edd, Tormund and the wildlings arrive. They brought along one of their giant friends (Wun-Wun?) in case anyone starts to act stupid. Actually, someone does act stupid but after the giant decides to play racquetball with that man's head just about everyone else gets with the program. There's some skirmishes but Dolorous Edd orders Thorne and Olly and a few other people sent to the cells. Upon seeing Jon Snow's corpse a saddened Tormund says he will burn it.
In King's Landing some peasant low lives are talking about seeing Queen Cersei naked. One man boasts about exposing himself to her and goes on at length about what he would do to her and how much she would like it. Ser Robert Strong (the modified and reanimated Mountain) tracks down that man and kills him. Right. Because no one in the slums noticed an eight fool tall zombie Kingsguard wandering around. Cersei is prevented on Tommen's orders from attending Myrcella's funeral, a command that almost causes some Lannister-on-Lannister violence. But as we see both with Jaime and later with Cersei, it's not disdain for his mother which inspired Tommen's order. It's guilt and self-hate. He can't face her. Tommen is very angry with himself for not standing up to the Church and preventing his mother and wife from being imprisoned and mocked. In fact he's so furious that he's starting to channel some of his brother Joffrey. Tommen is ready to start chopping heads and burning people. Tommen apologizes to his mother for being weak and begs her to help him to be strong. In the chapel there is a showdown between Jaime and the High Sparrow. When the High Sparrow gives his spiel about Margaery and Cersei needing to repent for their sins, an enraged Jaime steps into the High Sparrow's personal space and asks him "What about my sins?" In short you're dealing with a full grown man now. Jaime has his hand on his sword. Gangster move. But the High Sparrow is not intimidated. Not only does he appear to be unafraid to die he points out to Jaime that the High Sparrow's bodyguards are actually all around them. Jaime wouldn't make it out alive. The High Sparrow can't resist boasting that the numbers of the faithful mean they could overthrow an empire. Hmm. The pride seems pretty strong with this one. Well you know what the Bible says about pride.
In Meereen Tyrion is drinking and listening to a litany of bad news provided by Missandei (looking quite fetching), Varys and Grey Worm. Because they didn't receive any help from Daenerys her loyalists in Astapor and Yunkai have been crushed. Those cities have re-instituted slavery. No one knows who burned Daenerys' ships. And the two chained dragons, Rhaegal and Viserion, aren't eating. On this last Tyrion thinks he can provide a solution. His research has convinced him that chained dragons will refuse to eat and ultimately become weak and even possibly die. He decides to free the dragons. He theorizes that they are smart enough to know he means them no harm. It's touch and go for a while as the dragons are apparently considering whether to make a quick snack of Tyrion but as Varys watches from a safe distance the dragons apparently smell enough of Daenerys on Tyrion to trust his intentions. Or maybe as Tyrion surmised they're just smart. Either way, after some threat displays, they allow Tyrion to remove the bolts from their chains. In Braavos Arya is attacked by the waif again, and doesn't do much better than before. However this time Jaqen H'ghar comes to her after the attack. He offers all sorts of inducements for Arya to claim her identity again. But Arya says she's no one. Not even the promised of returned eyesight will tempt Arya. Pleased, Jaqen tells her to follow him and leave the beggar's bowl behind.
At Winterfell Roose, Ramsay and the new Lord Karstark are having a meeting. They deduce that Sansa will probably go to Castle Black. Ramsay wants to attack Castle Black and kill Jon Snow. After all if The Crown can legitimize Ramsay then who's to say that something similar couldn't be done for Jon Snow. If the North has a male Stark to rally around there's no telling what could happen. It's better to kill Snow now and take that possibility off the table. This idea is too much even for an evil old dude like Roose. He says that killing the Lord Commander is a stupid idea. All the other families will line up against us Sonny!! Roose tells Ramsay that if Ramsay doesn't do something about his growing mad dog reputation, eventually he'll be put down like a mad dog. Ramsay counters that as long as the Boltons have the largest families in the North they can do what they want. This meeting is interrupted by the Bolton maester who brings news that Lady Walda has given birth to a healthy baby boy. Roose is a new father. Roose is happy to hear this. Karstark, being a slimy toad of a kissa$$ offers his insincere congratulation. Ramsay's congratulations are even less believable. But he hugs his father. He also stabs him right in the gut. Roose dies just like Robb Stark. Lord Karstark seamlessly switches his alliance to Ramsay. Ramsay tells the maester to tell everyone that Roose was poisoned and by the way send for his stepmother and new half-brother. In a scene that has a very strong horror movie vibe Ramsay slowly walks with Walda and the baby into the kennels as Walda keeps asking where Roose is. Ramsay silently opens the kennels but has trained his dogs so well that they won't leave their cages. It's finally starting to dawn on Lady Walda what went down. Ramsay says that he is Lord Bolton. Walda begs for her life and that of Ramsay's baby brother. But Ramsay is merciless. He whistles and the dogs attack their prey. Thankfully this is kept offscreen.
Brienne and Sansa catch up as Podrick does his best to try to light a fire despite Theon's fears that a fire will draw unwelcome attention. It could be inferred that Brienne knows Sansa was raped as Sansa looks away and doesn't say anything when Brienne asks what happened at Winterfell. But that's up to the viewer. Sansa is, well maybe excited is the wrong word, but relieved to be going to Castle Black and seeing someone from her shattered family again. Theon is not so sanguine. He points out that Jon Snow would kill him on sight. Sansa says she would tell Jon that Theon didn't really murder Bran and Rickon but Theon isn't having it. He asks Sansa what about those children he did murder? He feels he's done too much wrong to ever be forgiven by the Starks. And though he's glad he helped Sansa he doesn't think he can make amends. He's going home--to the Iron Islands. At the Iron Islands Yara tells her father Balon of all their losses. The Iron Islanders have officially been ejected from the North. Balon isn't happy to hear all this bad news. He and his daughter trade insults before Balon pulls the "I'm your father so shut the f*** up and do what I say!" card. Patriarchal peace thus restored Balon leaves the tower by way of a rope bridge. But who should be at the end of that bridge but Balon's crazy younger brother Euron. There's apparently a kinslaying/regicide fever in Westeros because after a few insults and allusions to past events Euron throws Balon over the side. At the funeral Yara swears vengeance by the Salt Throne on whoever killed Balon but the head priest (I believe this is another uncle) sharply rebukes her. The Salt Throne is not hers to swear by. There must be an election or Kingsmoot. Maybe Yara will be the first woman to lead this band of Cthulhu worshipping Vikings and maybe she won't. That's not important. What's important is that proper procedures are followed.
Davos goes to see Melisandre (attired again in her normal incredibly resilient/revealing gown) to ask if she can bring Jon back. Melisandre is rather obviously dealing with a serious crisis of faith. She thinks that everything she's done has been lies. Davos disagrees and reminds her of some magic he's seen her do. Melisandre still doesn't think she can bring Jon back. She has given up on faith. She's a broken woman. But Davos is insistent. He tells her he's not asking the Lord of Light. He's asking her. So Melisandre decides to try. In a scene which I suppose almost by definition has Biblical allusions, Melisandre gently washes the blood and muck from Snow's corpse and cuts his hair. Tormund, Dolorous Edd, and Davos all watch. Ghost lies down and closes his eyes. Melisandre prays over the body and/or casts her spell. She burns some of Jon's hair This goes on for a while. The ritual reaches a crescendo and then comes to an end. Nothing. Jon Snow is dead. Melisandre says the words again and looks pleadingly at Jon's corpse and at Davos. Nope. Dead is dead. Wash, rinse and repeat. Melisandra says "Pleeeeeeeeeeease!" Nada. There's silence. Tormund is the first one to leave the room. With some sad glances Melisandre and then Dolorous Edd leave. Davos stays for a while longer. He can't believe that it didn't work.How could this be. With a sigh he too finally leaves. During all this time Ghost has been lying on the floor unmoving and quiet with his eyes closed. It's almost as if he was dead. The camera zooms in on Ghost. Ghost wakes up and opens his eyes. And so does Jon Snow!
What I liked
Jon Snow is back. And he has a list of who's been naughty and who's been nice.
IIRC Thoros of Myr also said that he was able to resurrect Beric when he was at his lowest ebb spiritually. So Melisandre being in that same valley of doubt was a nice touch.
I'm looking forward to learning if Jon Snow will be the same or will he be a completely different character.
Tommen's anger and doubt were nicely done. I think everyone has had some confrontations when they didn't say or do what they wanted to do. I don't think Tommen will have too many more of those.
For all the High Sparrow's talk about piety and faith and the people, he's clearly a man who loves power and control. I think that is going to harm him soon. He's made enemies of the two largest and most powerful families in Westeros.
No Dorne
I think that the Red Wedding made a lot of people think that none of the rules applied anymore. We have had multiple acts of regicide and kinslaying. I like that the show is showing how throwing out the rules can have negative unforeseen consequences. I think the execution could be a little better but all in all there are reasons for rules against kinslaying and murdering guests.
What I didn't like
I try not to compare the books to the show but Book!Roose was a cold and calculating man whose default behavior was paranoia. He didn't eat anything unless other people ate it first. He had body doubles posing as him to divert any assassination attempts. He had his own people pretending to be Ramsay's friends to keep an eye on Ramsay. So it just seemed a little out of character for him ever to let his guard down around Ramsay. He was fully aware of Ramsay's nature. I did appreciate that Roose died the same way he murdered Robb Stark.
Murdering Walda makes an enemy of the Freys, which as Robb Stark, Catelyn Stark and Edmure Tully could tell you, is not a very wise idea.
I appreciate Davos' loyalty to Jon but where does it come from? Shouldn't he be more interested in finding out about how Stannis, Shireen and Selyse died?
This is a mildly entertaining thriller that starts out with a lot of promise but loses it a bit about halfway through. It remains an ok read but I felt it was stretched out a little bit longer than it needed to be. The ending was hugely melodramatic but it wasn't like that wasn't telegraphed. In a book that is almost 600 pages I am going to expect something a little bit more epic than what The Caretaker turned out to be. That could be in part because of a decreasing patience or declining attention span on my part. I'm not sure. I can definitely say that if you are stuck somewhere for hours with no mental stimulation at hand this book could come in quite handy. You know the sorts of arenas of which I speak--places like auto dealerships, hospitals, corporate headquarters-- where all you can do is hurry up and wait. One thing which the author did which I wasn't too crazy about is to end sentences by alluding to the fate of major characters or letting you know who the bad guy is. If he did it once or twice that would be amusing or even exciting. It might make me curious. But there were constant references to wondering how a major character would be enjoying prison right now or explaining that it's too bad that another major character didn't know that he was dealing with a sociopath. Part of the joy in reading a book like this is in figuring out who the bad guy is, who the mark is, what the con is and what the motivations of the bad guy are. So much of that was given away so early that instead of being sucked in by the con, figuring it out and identifying with the so far clueless heroes and heroines, I felt a little separated from the protagonists and villains. Either they were too stupid or too obvious in their evil. The joy of being conned by stories like these is in figuring it out for yourself. Would you really enjoy a magician who instead of doing a trick for you explained in detail exactly how the trick worked even as he was doing it? Well some people would. Perhaps if while the magician was explaining the trick you were watching, he did another magic trick that you didn't even see until the end, then that might be ok? You could argue that that's what Simpson did here. Yes that might be the book's saving grace. But as I said I just thought it was a bit too long. Gunn Henderson Jr. is a tall stereotypical WASP Alpha Male salesman. He works for an unnamed shoe company (think Nike). Gunn is the kind of man who doesn't feel that his day is complete unless he has proven that he's better than you at something. Gunn's a sharp dressed ultra competitive man who doesn't take any s*** off of anybody. Anybody. That includes his marks clients, other salesmen, his bosses, women in general and especially his attractive wife Samantha or Sam. Sam is, if not quite a desperate housewife, getting pretty close to that status.
Sam likes all the benefits and lifestyle that her successful husband provides. She likes that Gunn is tall, well built, handsome and dominant. Unfortunately, for Sam's tastes, Gunn's dominance too often slides over into bullying domineering behavior. Sam likes a man who leads. But she doesn't like Gunn's control freak tendencies. Gunn comes by his persona naturally. Gunn's father, a retired banker, is the same way. Both of the Henderson adult men view life as something where they win and everyone else loses. Gunn does provide materially, sexually and occasionally romantically, but he's self-absorbed. Even Sam must accept that it's Gunn's world. Sam's just living in it. When Sam gets a phone call from someone offering Gunn a new job she breaks her husband's rules and opens his mail containing the job offer. This new sales job, which Sam helps convince Gunn to take, offers a tremendous salary, bonus, incentives and the possibility to be in on the ground floor of something big. The Hendersons could become overnight multi-millionaires. The Hendersons and their two children sell their home and move into a mansion on an estate provided by their new employer. Their kids will attend a fancy private school. Gunn won't be able to enjoy too many of the benefits as he will be on the road at least 6 days a week trying to sell the new product. And even for a master salesman like Gunn, this product will be a tough sell. But never fear, the house comes complete with a housekeeper and cook, Mrs. Griner and a caretaker and handyman, Brady. Brady appears to be a patient, solicitous, careful, shy man, everything that Gunn isn't. While Gunn is off pounding the pavement, Sam finds herself growing more attracted to Brady. It probably helps that Brady, who is in even better shape than Gunn, likes to start off his day with a morning dive in the nude. Sam likes to watch that. Brady's a great listener and true gentleman. Sam slowly starts to confide in Brady. There is an old quote which may or may not have been said by the actress Lana Turner which is "A gentleman is merely a patient wolf." I really liked the setup and early execution. I just thought it dragged in the middle. There is a certain Perils of Pauline aspect to this story. There's also an investigation of exactly how a marriage, or really any intimate relationship can come under deadly strain and either blow up or hold together against the odds. Gunn is an occasionally brutal jerk but he is a hard working one. I liked the examples of the stress a salesman is under. Sam may be the primary protagonist but she's not necessarily always sympathetic. The Ballad of Black Tom By Victor Lavalle
The writer H.P. Lovecraft (HPL) was a racist. HPL believed wholeheartedly in White Anglo-Saxon supremacy. He ignored any contrary evidence. He appears to have been completely unaware of the Harlem Renaissance which occurred during one of his most productive periods. In the rare cases where HPL conceded that white supremacy wasn't obvious he had no problem with others (he was something of a shrinking violet himself) employing violence to maintain white status. As late as 1936 HPL was praising Hitler. The groups HPL didn't like initially included just about everyone who wasn't Anglo-Saxon, Celtic or other Western-European descended American. HPL had special contempt for black people, whom he barely accepted as human. HPL wasn't crazy about Jews, despite briefly marrying a Jewish woman. During that short marriage, HPL moved to and lived in Brooklyn, NYC. HPL didn't enjoy his Gotham sojourn. During his infrequent job searches HPL discovered that even his whiteness did not prevent would be employers from demanding experience and references, neither of which he had. HPL didn't like crowds. He certainly didn't like being around numerous non-whites, which by his reckoning, was a category that included Arabs, Turks, Persians, Central Asians, East Asians, South Asians, Italians, North Africans, Kurds, Blacks, -in short all the people who were moving to NYC at the time, often from overseas. HPL would actually step off the street to avoid being in close proximity to those he considered to be his lessers. His friends said that the sight of minorities or mixed crowds could drive HPL into a rage. HPL was also one of the greatest horror writers of the 20th century. HPL often placed his real life fears in his fiction. So it's unsurprising that all of HPL's then current New York City derived xenophobia, bias and racism was reflected in his short story "The Horror At Red Hook." (THRH) This story was a fever dream about non-white immigrants in NYC who are committed to some sort of devil worship. An Irish cop opposes them. A Dutch dilettante helps and directs them, though he may fall victim to the cultists or something they call up from Outside. THRH was not a very good story, even by pulp standards. The plot is weak. But plot is not where HPL made a name for himself. Where he excelled was atmosphere, mood and description, of which THRH had plenty. As stated, in THRH HPL let loose with some bile. These are typical passages: The population is a hopeless tangle and enigma; Syrian, Spanish, Italian, and negro elements impinging upon one another, and fragments of Scandinavian and American belts lying not far distant. It is a babel of sound and filth, and sends out strange cries to answer the lapping of oily waves at its grimy piers and the monstrous organ litanies of the harbour whistles.. Hordes of prowlers reel shouting and singing along the lanes and thoroughfares, occasional furtive hands suddenly extinguish lights and pull down curtains, and swarthy, sin-pitted faces disappear from windows when visitors pick their way through. Indeed, it would not have been too much to say that the old scholar’s particular circle coincided almost perfectly with the worst of the organised cliques which smuggled ashore certain nameless and unclassified Asian dregs wisely turned back by Ellis Island... Their squat figures and characteristic squinting physiognomies, grotesquely combined with flashy American clothing, appeared more and more numerously among the loafers and nomad gangsters of the Borough Hall section.. Suddenly the leader of the visiting mariners, an Arab with a hatefully negroid mouth, pulled forth a dirty, crumpled paper and handed it to the captain...
Lavalle is a writer who counts HPL as an influence but was apparently troubled by HPL's racism and xenophobia. He writes that he dedicates The Ballad of Black Tom to HPL "with all of my conflicted feelings". The Ballad of Black Tom is a retelling/reworking of THRH. It's mostly told from the point of view of the titular character Thomas Lester, a young black man who's not very good at either music or the art of the con. Lester mostly makes his living by playing music on the street for cash. However since he only knows three or four songs and can't even play those well he usually has to leave Harlem to make any money. Lester also earns a living by doing odd jobs for people, finding things which they can't find or can't reach. He lives with his sickly father. When the amateur anthropologist Robert Suydam runs across Lester on the street he invites Lester to play for him at a party Suydam's putting together. Despite Suydam's offer of employment Lester doesn't like Suydam, who can barely conceal his contempt. But a gig is a gig. The police officer Thomas Malone and the private detective Howard (a fictionalized stand-in for author Robert E. Howard) steal the money that Suydam gave to Lester as an upfront fee. Howard sees no reason a black man should have that kind of money. At the request of Suydam's family Howard and Malone are keeping a watch on Suydam. Suydam's family thinks he's mad. Intrigued and still needing money Lester has no choice but to attend the strange gathering at Suydam's house. He also needs to avoid Howard, Malone and other racist cops or white people who are quick to harass, insult or even assault him should they find him in the wrong neighborhood. There is some sort of supernatural power out there which Suydam, no matter how ineptly, may have tapped into. Lester will need to decide what to do about that. Lester, not Suydam or Malone, is the moral center of this story. Although he's not a good musician, Lester is much smarter than anyone realizes. Lester knows that people see what they want to see. Spiritual blindness is a recurring theme in the story. This is a quick read at about 150 pages. It is not necessary to know of or have a liking for HPL to enjoy this story. The issues raised in the story are still vibrant today. I liked the story. I will look for more work by the author.
Well we're back. And Jon Snow is dead. Dead as a doornail. There is no doubt whatever about that. Let me repeat emphatically that Jon Snow is dead. But this is no Christmas Carol. We open with a panoramic shot of the Castle Black courtyard centered on Snow's corpse to make that fact clear. We hear Ghost howling with grief and scratching at the door. Not for nothing but you would think that the Stark children would know by now not to get separated from their wolves. It seems like bad things happen. Davos knows something's up so he leaves his room and discovers Jon's body. Along with some of the Night's Watch members who didn't stab Jon 5011 times he takes Jon's corpse inside. Everyone immediately knows Thorne did it. But Dolorous Edd says that they can't trust anyone who's not in the room. Melisandre enters. She says she saw Jon fighting at Winterfell in her flames. Davos is less interested in prophecies and more interested in getting people to guard against the attack which he knows must be coming. He suggests setting Ghost free. While Jon's friends are ready to make a last stand and go out hard, Davos thinks it's better to make a stand and survive. He convinces Dolorous Edd to go for help. Exactly who Edd is going to ask for help is unsaid but I would guess that that Davos is talking about the wildlings. Meanwhile Thorne is overseeing a meeting to explain what happened. As he says, and he may well be honest here, he never liked Jon Snow. But Thorne never disobeyed orders. But he could not stand by and countenance Jon letting the wildlings thru the Wall and giving them lands where they had often robbed, raped and pillaged. Thorne, and several other Night's Watch leaders saw that as treason to the Night Watch. It was something that would destroy the Night's Watch. It violated, as they saw it, the whole purpose of the Night's Watch. So they had to act. Thorne isn't hiding anything. Later on Thorne knocks on the door of the room where Davos and the die hard Snow loyalists are hiding. He offers to give amnesty to anyone who lays down their weapons and provide Davos and Melisandre safe passage south. But they've got to surrender before nightfall. Thorne won't say what will happen after that but then again I don't suppose he has to does he?
Davos politely agrees to consider the offer. When Thorne leaves Davos scorns the offer and says they're dead if they agree to it. Not a very trusting fellow that Davos. Davos muses that they need to get Melisandre on their side. Otherwise Dolorous Edd is their only chance. At Winterfell Ramsay Bolton mourns over Myranda's corpse. He reminisces about their happy times together and promises vengeance. Even so he orders the maester to feed the corpse to his dogs. Roose congratulates his son on their victory over a depleted and demoralized Baratheon army. But Roose being Roose he has to stick the knife in to Ramsay. He reminds Ramsay that by marrying Sansa Stark, the Boltons have made an enemy of the Lannisters. And a Lannister always pays his debts. To fight the Lannisters the Boltons will need the entire North. To unify the North they need Sansa Stark and an heir. Ramsay has lost both. But no matter, Roose's wife will produce an heir. So Ramsay needn't worry after all. Isn't that wonderful? Roose, as always, looks quite pleased with himself. Sansa and Reek Theon are running away from the Bolton hounds and soldiers. They cross the river in an attempt to throw off the hounds. They take respite in a crevice beneath a tree. Theon hugs Sansa in an attempt to share his body warmth. But before they can get warm and start to recall all the good times they had at Winterfell, the hounds and soldiers are upon them. Apparently they didn't fall for the old "hide my scent by crossing running water" routine. Either finding nobility or simply tired of running, Theon tells Sansa to get to Castle Black where her brother Jon is Lord Commander. He then steps out in front of the soldiers to give her a chance to flee. The soldiers want to know where Sansa is but Theon claims she's dead. Well noses don't lie. The dogs find Sansa, who is apparently too tired and cold to run any longer. At that point, Brienne and Podrick (well mostly Brienne) show up and make mincemeat of the Bolton crew. In a bit of a cliched scene, Theon finds something of his shattered soul/manhood by stabbing someone who was just about to kill Podrick. Brienne again offers her loyalty and service to Sansa. This time Sansa accepts, though she's still shivering and has to be coached through some of the words.
A pensive Cersei hears of a ship returning from Dorne. Excited she goes down to the harbor. But she can tell by Jaime's expression that their daughter is dead. She admits that Myrcella was nothing like her. Myrcella was good, honest and decent. Cersei starts to obsess over the ugly physical changes of death and speaks of the prophecy that all of her children will die before her. Jaime interrupts to say f*** the prophecy and f*** everyone who is not a Lannister. He promises revenge. Margaery is still in prison. She wants to see her brother Loras. A septa reads scripture to her and urges her to confess. Margaery won't do that. The septa gets upset. She is about to lay hands on Margaery in a non-pleasant way. But before the beating can commence the High Sparrow, who has presumably been watching, decides to play Good Cop to the Septa's Bad Cop. He also urges confession and in a psychological twist gets Margaery to admit that no one is truly without sin. In Braavos Arya is living the streets as a blind beggar girl. Some people drop coins in her bowl. But apparently this is all just part of a test as the Waif girl comes to ask Arya if she has been listening. As most of us would likely do Arya is like what? And that's when the Waif gives Arya a quarterstaff and commands her to fight. Being blind is Arya's problem, not hers, says the Waif. The Waif beats up Arya something fierce. She promises to see Arya tomorrow. Apparently the beatings will continue until Arya's other senses, and answers, improve. Jorah and Daario are searching for Daenerys. Daario teases Jorah about his unrequited love for Daenerys but Jorah is beyond taking offense. All the same if you were alone with a desperate and armed romantic rival wouldn't you be a bit careful about what you said to him or her? If I were Daario I might not turn my back to Jorah. There's a lot of ways a man can die out there in the wilderness. Anyway Jorah finds Daenerys' ring. He also checks himself and sees that the greyscale is still spreading.
In Meereen Varys and Tyrion walk through the city without any bodyguards to get the lay of the land. Varys corrects Tyrion's Valyrian when Tyrion tries to tell an impoverished woman that he wants to give her money so that she can feed her baby. From what the duo can tell the lower classes are starting to turn against Daenerys. The Lord of Light is also gaining more followers. And oh yes, while they're out walking, someone has burned all of Daenerys' ships. Speaking of Daenerys she has been made a slave of the local Dothraki horde. Her two guards muse about what she looks like naked. They reach their encampment and turn her over to Khal Moro, their leader. In what seems like a humorous nod to Monty Python's "What have the Romans ever done for us" riff, Khal Moro declares that there is nothing more magnificent than seeing a woman nude for the first time. His lieutenants, being the philosophical contrarians that they are, counter with various other events in life, which mostly involve pillaging and looting. Khal Moro, rolling his eyes, concedes the point by saying ok, seeing a woman nude for the first time must be among the FIVE greatest things in life. And as his hands are straying closer to his weapons, his lieutenants know now is the time to shut up. Daenerys reveals that not only does she speak Dothraki but she is Daenerys Stormborn, first of her name, blah blah blah. That doesn't impress the Dothraki much but when she tells them that she is Khal Drogo's widow that gives Khal Moro pause. One does not rape or enslave a fellow Khal's widow. No the proper plan of action is to take Daenerys to Vaes Dothrak to live with the other widowed Khaleesis.
In Dorne Prince Doran is taking a rare walk though his gardens, assisted by his effective sister-in-law, Ellaria Sand. He talks of his brother Oberyn's adventures and erotic exploits. He envied Oberyn those things but hey someone had to rule and as oldest that fell to him. Ellaria smiles and agrees and helps her lover's brother back to his throne. At that point a maester(?)/messenger (?) brings news of Myrcella's death. But before Doran can do anything other than look shocked Ellaria and the Sand Snakes kill Areo Hotah and Doran and the messenger too for good measure. The other guards look on impassively as Ellaria stabs Doran at least ten thousand times. She calls him weak and insults him for never taking vengeance for Elia's and Oberyn's death. Dorne can no longer be ruled by weak men. And that writ includes his son Trystane, who is murdered by his cousins the Sand Snakes on his ship. I wonder if all the people who were clutching their pearls about the show's alleged violence against women problem will stop watching because a woman drove an 8 foot spear through the back of her male cousin's head and joked about it. I'm betting not. The show's final scene was both a bit of fanservice and a confirmation of some theories. Melisandre (cleavage alert!) is standing in front of the mirror in her typical low cut gown. She has been looking in the fires. She looks depressed. She takes off her gown and stares at herself. She then removes her ruby choker. It would appear that Melisandre is not a young woman but rather a woman who is well over a hundred years old. Maybe she's multiple centuries old. Either way she's older than dirt and looks about as attractive as mud. Evidently she's having a crisis of faith and wanted to remind herself who she is.
What I liked
I liked the ending of the Doran storyline. He was boring. In the books GRRM spends a lot of time on Doran and his plans for his son. It was even more boring than the show. I am happy that the show creators have apparently confirmed that Doran and Areo Hotah were not important to the end game.
The joking between Khal Moro and his lieutenants.
The oath of allegiance between Brienne and Sansa
Ghost
Melisandre (and not just for the obvious reasons either). I thought that the actress did a pretty good job communicating spiritual crisis. I was reminded of those people who run around saying that the world is going to end on this day. When it doesn't end, what do they do if they were true believers?
Roose's jocular mood. He makes evil look fun.
What I didn't like
If you discovered that close relatives were involved in a plot to work against your interests, would you, like Prince Doran, have these relatives free and walking around you with weapons? I'm guessing not. I just don't like Dorne, either in the books or the show. But even though I'm happy Doran is off the show his demise at the hands of his female relatives feels like fanservice to people who were upset at the Sansa storyline.
Varys and Tyrion walking around without any bodyguards. I suppose that given how ineffective The Unsullied have been in street fighting Varys and Tyrion could have decided they would be better off without them. Still given that some unknown people in Meereen just tried to take out Daenerys and ALL of her supporters, some sort of protection detail might be in order.
I thought Trystane was on the same boat with Myrcella? Even if he wasn't he apparently knew about her death? Why was he just sitting around without any guards? Oh well. It's not like he will be missed.
The last thing Ned Stark told Jon Snow was that the next time they talked he would tell Jon all about Jon's mother. Benioff and Weiss had to answer (presumably correctly) this post title question for GRRM before he allowed them to adapt his A Song of Ice and Fire series for HBO. Although this post does not technically contain spoilers as GRMM, Benioff or Weiss haven't publicly answered the question, this post provides what I consider to be the correct, obvious and most widely held answer. Season Five of Game of Thrones made increasingly obvious (IMO) hints to the answer. Season Six may include flashbacks, some of which could be written about below. So if you don't want to discuss Jon Snow's mother and why that's important to the story, you should probably skip this post. This post references numerous book details, which if you've not read the books, might be things you don't want to know. Caveat lector.
Rickard Stark, Ned Stark's father, wanted to link the Starks and the North to powerful Southern families. Rickard fostered Ned with the Arryns of the Vale. Rickard arranged for his eldest son and heir Brandon, to marry Catelyn Tully of the Riverlands. Rickard Stark betrothed his only daughter Lyanna to Robert Baratheon of the Stormlands. Remember that in GRRM's fictional world, similar to our own, upper class marriages are often not about love between a man and a woman but rather about political alliances, settling rivalries, ending wars, and obtaining land and wealth. A person's individual happiness, romantic dreams or sexual satisfaction are unimportant when weighed against other factors. Lyanna Stark and Brandon Stark were both more impulsive than their stolid brother Ned. It's described in the books as having "wolf-blood". Ned thinks that their headstrong nature led to their demise. How did this happen? Prince Rhaegar won a tournament and gave the prize to Lyanna Stark, instead of to his own wife, Elia. Eventually, as the story goes, Rhaegar kidnapped, and per Sansa Stark's recounting, raped Lyanna Stark. When Brandon Stark and later Rickard Stark went to King's Landing to demand justice the Mad King Aerys had them murdered in the most grotesque of ways. Rickard Stark was cooked to death in front of his son. Brandon Stark was slowly strangled while vainly trying to save his father. Aerys wanted to make a clean sweep of Starks and their supporters. He ordered Jon Arryn to surrender his wards Ned Stark and Robert Baratheon. Jon Arryn suggested that the King commit an anatomically impossible act. Arryn called his banners. It was on. Ned Stark and Jon Arryn each married Tully daughters to seal their alliance with House Tully. Ned impregnated Catelyn and went off to war. Robert Baratheon killed Rhaegar Targaryen. Lyanna Stark died from unknown causes.
At the war's end Ned returned safe and sound to his wife and firstborn son. But he also brought back a child, a boy named Jon. To put it mildly, Catelyn wasn't exactly ecstatic about this turn of events. To be fair who would be? If your new spouse came home with a child that wasn't yours would you be happy? Ned refused to discuss Jon or his mother. Ned let people believe that Jon's mother might be any number of women, most of whom were conveniently deceased, lowborn or continents away. It wasn't uncommon for a wealthy Lord to father a child out of wedlock, but it was VERY unusual for a Lord to raise such a child with his trueborn children. That was a violation of social mores and a serious insult to a wife. This is why Catelyn Stark, in both book and show, never warmed to Jon Snow. To Catelyn, Jon was a walking reminder of Ned's infidelity. Catelyn also viewed Jon as a peril to her children's inheritance. Catelyn could not fully vent this frustration to Ned. But Catelyn certainly showed Jon her indifference and/or disdain. We know that Ned and Catelyn had an unusual marriage for Westerosi nobles because they actually liked and loved each other. Ned valued his wife's counsel. Catelyn learned to appreciate Ned's reserve and caring nature. In books they each separately think about how nice it would be to have another child together. But loving spouse or not there are clearly some limits beyond which Ned will not go. In the books the one time Catelyn recalls Ned being mean or cold to her is when she asks him about Jon's mother. Catelyn suspects that Jon's mother is an old flame of Ned's.
It had taken her a fortnight to marshal her courage, but finally, in bed one night, Catelyn had asked her husband the truth of it, asked him to his face. That was the only time in all their years that Ned had ever frightened her. "Never ask me about Jon," he said, cold as ice. "He is my blood, and that is all you need to know. And now I will learn where you heard that name my lady." She had pledged to obey; she told him; and from that day on the whispering had stopped, and Ashara Dayne's name was never heard in Winterfell again.
Well isn't this curious. Ned Stark, Mr. Nice Guy himself, is suddenly coldly dismissive to his wife to the point of frightening her. He evidently severely corrects some gossipy Winterfell residents. Obviously Jon's parentage is a sore spot with Ned. Even more curious, notice that Ned refers to Jon as "my blood" and not "my son" when speaking to Catelyn. In the show Ned is not as abrupt with Robert when Robert teases Ned about his infidelity but he nonetheless makes it crystal clear that he doesn't want to talk about Jon or his mother. During the last season Stannis, who is strict and inflexible in a different fashion from Ned, mused that infidelity was never Ned's way. Ned was if nothing else, a righteous man. Do we really believe that a man who tried his best to live by both the letter and the spirit of the law would dishonor his new wife by immediately cheating on her? That seems unlikely. Although Westeros may not have divorce as such Ned would be risking the new alliance with the Tullys by insulting Catelyn. He would also risk losing the respect of his bannermen, something that in a milieu lacking centralized armies could be dangerous. Ned may not be the most devious man to ever come from the North but he's not stupid. He wouldn't hurt his wife or damage his own reputation unless he had no choice. So why would he feel he had no choice? Because Ned made a promise. And you know how Ned feels about promises. Ned and six of his closest bannermen apparently learned that Lyanna was at the Tower of Joy. They tracked her down to that location only to find that she was being guarded by three Kingsguard members, one of whom is the brother of Ned's former crush. In the ensuing showdown only Ned and his bannerman Howland Reed, father of Jojen and Meera, survived. Lyanna died shortly afterwards in a "bed of blood". Among her last words to Ned were "Promise me Ned." This memory is something which causes Ned immense grief. He believes that he's paid a cost for that promise for the past decade and a half. He could still hear her at times. Promise me, she had cried, in a room that smelled of blood and roses. Promise me, Ned. The fever had taken her strength and her voice had been faint as a whisper, but when he gave his word, the fear had gone out of his sister’s eyes. “I will,” Ned promised her. That was his curse. Robert would swear undying love and forget them before evenfall, but Ned Stark kept his vows.He thought of the promises he’d made Lyanna as she lay dying, and the price he’d paid to keep them.
Hmm. To what price is Ned referring? Remember that per books, Catelyn's annoyance with Jon is heightened by the fact that Jon resembles Ned more strongly than any of her children except Arya. Jon and Arya look alike. But Robb, Sansa, Rickon and Bran all take more after their mother, Catelyn. When Arya is depressed/angry about her unconventional looks, Ned raises her spirits by telling her that she's a late bloomer. Ned says that Arya is actually a dead ringer for Lyanna Stark, who was considered one of the great beauties in all of the Kingdoms. So if Arya looks like her aunt Lyanna and Jon looks like Arya, it makes sense that Jon looks like his mother Lyanna. And since the Starks are not incestuous Lannisters, Ned is not Jon's father. Rhaegar Targaryen is. Ned took the child as his own to protect Jon from Robert's wrath.Robert Baratheon hated Rhaegar Targeyen for "stealing" Lyanna Stark from him. At the rebellion's end Robert Baratheon was happy/relieved to see the Lannisters present the slaughtered children of Rhaegar Targaryen to him. Years later Robert was making plans to assassinate Rhaegar's sister, Daenerys. It's safe to say that Robert is not exactly rational on the subject of Targaryens. Although Robert is Ned's best friend and foster brother, he's also Ned's king. Robert accepts more honest talk and disagreement from Ned than he does from most people but the bottom line is that when Robert gives Ned a direct order, he expects Ned to follow it. And Robert would want to kill Rhaegar's last son. Robert would see the son of the previous heir to the throne as a direct threat to his rule. It's unthinkable that Ned would ever turn over his sister's son to his best friend for execution. Ned keeps his promises. The solution that Ned found was to sacrifice his own reputation and some closeness with his wife in order to keep his nephew safe. It's not just Robert whom Ned would need to worry about. What would various other factions do if they knew there was a Targaryen heir still alive in Westeros and that Lord Stark was protecting him? Blackmail could be the least of Ned's worries. Ned doesn't tell Catelyn because as Ned muses, if Catelyn were ever in a position to protect her own children by sacrificing Jon, she just might do it. The best way to keep a secret is to keep it to yourself. Catelyn couldn't reveal what she doesn't know. Ned thought, If it came to that, the life of some child I did not know, against Robb and Sansa and Arya and Bran and Rickon, what would I do? Even more so, what would Catelyn do, if it were Jon’s life, against the children of her body. He did not know. He prayed he never would.
In an internal monologue why would Ned not list Jon with his other children?
Ned and Barristan Selmy never remember Rhaegar as any sort of rapist or cruel man. That seems really odd for someone like Ned, who clearly adored his baby sis. Wouldn't it seem that Ned would have some negative thoughts about Rhaegar if Rhaegar really did what some say he did? Robert, not Ned, is the one who is constantly bad mouthing Rhaegar. Robert places Lyanna on a pedestal. That could well be because Robert never really knew Lyanna, as Ned gently points out. Robert liked Lyanna's beauty and the idea of Lyanna marrying him but Lyanna didn't necessarily reciprocate those feelings. Lyanna was a strong willed young woman who wasn't crazy about marrying Robert Baratheon, who even as a youth already had a reputation for being something of a ladies man. “Robert will never keep to one bed,” Lyanna had told him at Winterfell, on the night long ago when their father had promised her hand to the young Lord of Storm’s End. “I hear he has gotten a child on some young girl in the Vale.” Ned had held the babe in his arms; he could scarcely deny her, nor would he lie to his sister, but he assured her that what Robert did before their betrothal was of no matter, that he was a good man and true who would love her with all his heart. Lyanna had only smiled. “Love is sweet, dearest Ned, but it cannot change a man’s nature."
Lyanna was a fantastic horserider who could handle weapons and may have defeated knights at a joust. We also know that she cried tears of joy at Rhaegar's music. It's a good bet that not only was Lyanna able to defend herself if need be but also that she liked Rhaegar. And unlike say Gregor Clegane, there are no hushed tales told of Rhaegar's rapes or crimes. Isn't it possible, even likely, that Lyanna willingly eloped with Rhaegar instead of being kidnapped? So any intimacies were consensual. There are some characters in A Song of Ice and Fire who speak dismissively of women in battle, pointing out that a woman's battle is in the birthing bed, not the field. So what was Lyanna doing in a "bed of blood"? And why were Kingsguard members there if not to protect someone of royal blood? I think Kingsguard members were there to protect the pregnant Queen and newly born royal prince, Jon Snow, who is Ice (Stark) and Fire (Targaryen). And since Targaryens were polygamy friendly, who's to say that Rhaegar and Lyanna weren't legally married, making Jon Snow Targaryen the legitimate ruler of the Seven Kingdoms? There's probably only one man alive who knows the truth of the matter, Stark bannerman Howland Reed. It's easier on Robert's ego for him to believe that his betrothed was abducted, raped and murdered than to accept that a woman coolly evaluated him, considered her options and ran away with someone else. And Ned being Ned never sees fit to correct his friend. Although Robert may well view Lyanna's "kidnapping" as casus belli it's not clear that anyone else does. Without Brandon Stark foolishly challenging Rhaegar to come out and die and the Mad King's overreaction, war could have been avoided. Anyway, Ned Stark does not believe in hurting children. He lied and confessed to treason to save Sansa's life. Ned was willing to be insulted and dismissed from court to save Daenerys' life. And Ned was willing to dishonor his name and damage his relationship with Catelyn to save Jon's life.
